Once upon a time I attended an NA meeting. It was in earlier days of my life when I was considering becoming a counselor. As part of my own personal exploration I went to some training with a few organizations that specialized in drug addiction training and counseling. On the side I went to a Narcotics Anonymous meeting just to see what it was like.
Interestingly enough, I learned a bit about myself at that meeting. Even more crazy, I'm not sure I understood what I learned until 25 years later (um, that would be until recently). My favorite quote I learned at that meeting was the initials F.E.A.R. stood for F*** Everything And Run. Seems like a good abbreviation to me.
I've always had a unique way of looking at everything that happens around me. No doubt you've read between the lines (you're so sneaky like that) of this blog and seen some of the underlying *me* shine thru.
For example, I am not sure I believe in good and evil. What is good is judged so by people's standards and our standards change over time. While I don't believe I have a racist bone in my body, I found myself wondering the other day how I would perceive the things around me if the nazis had won in the 40s. How different would I believe if I were raised in that crazy FLDS sect in my home town of Eldorado, TX? How different would it be if I'd been raised by a father and mother who loved each other and didn't divide the family up across thousands of square miles? How would my adult life be different if I had had two dads or two moms?
What is good by 1970s standards (who knew soda was bad for us? who knew bottled water would become the scourge of our society?) is not so good by 2000s standards. What was shown as progress and the American way in the 1950s is just plain scary today.
We are always finding out something we used to hold as a firm belief isn't necessarily true.
Today I talked to a mother about not yelling at her kid when she got home. Sure, the kid broke a list of rules, but how important were the rules to begin with? Were they life-threatening or where they just set up as guidelines? I told her to have a discussion with her daughter about how her schedule was disrupted by her lack of attention and to ask her daughter when she wants to reschedule the event that was missed. She asked me why she should still go through with the event and I said because it was what you promised your daughter for her birthday. Before you get all judgmental on my advice, I should probably point out that the daughter is living at home and going to college, she's like 20 or 21.
My father once reminded me that there is indeed evil alive and well working in our lives. I'm not so sure I agree. Again, what is good and what is not? I'd say anything that adds to our experience of life is a good thing. right?
How granular do we need to get when we are doing things? I mean if Mother Theresa had never committed a selfish act, then why didn't she starve? it seems like we eat to sustain our bodies, and that, in itself is a selfish thing. Is being selfish evil?
Hmmmm. So I'm rambling all over the place. I blame the internet. I have no attention span any more.
